*strokes beard* mhmmmmmm

severalbadpunslater:

whoreoscopes:

doomf:

That’s a cute foot fetish you got there, would you mind keeping it 25796323689432 feet away from me?

25796323689432 feet you say?

image

this is literally my favorite post on tumblr

inked-virtue:

dxcade:

DO U EVEN LIFT MR WAYNE

Literal burn

insanity-and-vanity:

Literally me

insanity-and-vanity:

Literally me

clannyphantom:

my bf told me a story about how when he was in the 7th grade he was really sick and almost died and had to stay in bed and no one came to see him on his birthday but his world of warcraft friends threw him a virtual party and if that doesnt warm your heart then idk what will

religiousmom:

do you ever wanna listen to music but every song is just not the right song

motherfuckingdragonsyo:

I made an old lady blush today at work because she ordered two senior coffees and I said “SENIOR ? I’m sorry miss, i’m going to have to ask to see some ID.” and she covered her mouth and went “Oh dear me” and couldn’t stop smiling

imaginethedarkerside:

dunflower:

u know someone is having a rough day when their favorite song plays and they don’t sing along

No one will understand how much this just broke my heart.